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Irish Coffee: Top 5 Celtics Rappers

Wake up with the Celtics [1] and your daily dose of Irish Coffee ‘€¦

Other than the player’s union’ s legal action [2] against the NBA over all the hullabaloo [3] about technical fouls, it’s a slow Celtics Friday. Inspired by Marquis Daniels [4]‘ new hip hop track “Something to Talk About,” I thought we’d do a little Celtics Idol with C’s turned rappers. Submit your vote in the comments section below. (Drum roll please) And the nominees are …

MARQUIS DANIELS (AKA Q6)

Song: “Something to Talk About” feat. Kevin Cossom
Lyric: “I plan to raise the game until my bank account impregnate.
The haters say I regulate. Cheese on that beefsteak.”
Simon Cowell: “Not everybody is perfect, and I don’t think we should be looking for perfect people.”

SHAQUILLE O’NEAL [5] (AKA Shaq Diesel)

Song: “(I Know I Got) Skillz” feat. Def Jef
Lyrics: “I got a hand that’ll rock ya cradle,
cream you like cheese, spread you on my bagel,
my Ford Explorer boomin’ with the clumped-up funk,
all you jealous punks can’t stop my dunks.”
Simon Cowell: “You’ve got quite a good voice, the problem I have is this looks to me like 10 years ago.”

DANA BARROS

Song: “Check It”
Lyric: “I’m about to snap, so you better give me room.
I’m blowing up on the hit when it go boom.
Mad dough’s what I made when I played.”
Simon Cowell: “A natural. A total natural. And I like you.”

GARY PAYTON

Song: “Livin’ Legal and Large”
Lyrics: “On my way to practice to work on my shot
’cause you can’t stop even you reach the top.
Check it, a lot of folks hate the fact that I’m the man
Got the mic to the left and the ball in my right hand.”
Simon Cowell: “Not in a billion years. There are only so many words I can drag out of my vocabulary to say how awful that was.”

BRIAN SHAW

Song: “Anything Can Happen”
Lyrics: “So, what I do, I keeps a lo-pro composure,
developing my skills without no exposure
Born in Oakland, California, raised in Richmond,
class of 1983, smacking opponents coming in my kitchen.”
Simon Cowell: “It was dreadful. No, no, really dreadful. I’m telling you to be kind, because you will never, ever, ever have a career in singing.”

AND THE WINNER IS … My vote is clearly for Dana Barros. Dude can rhyme. His song’s got a little old school feel to it, like a Naughty by Nature production.

(Have a question, concern or conception for tomorrow’€™s Irish Coffee? Send a message to @brohrbach [6] on Twitter.)